Palms of Our Hands

A Polytheist's Blog

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Pagan Blog Project – M: Moving On From Christopaganism

The first time in awhile I could come and post–school has eaten me alive, but I finished my program and am gonna start job hunting soon.  Meanwhile, I’ve been slowly building a daily ritual of offerings and prayer towards the Canaanite pantheon.

I’m conscientious about my path at the moment.  I’ve been exploring different spiritualities and religions for years, ever since going to college.  In the last 5 years, I’ve always come back to Catholicism. As cool it would be to worship the deities of the Philippines, where my family comes from, I have a hard time associating the Philippines (and my family) with anything but Catholicism.

So it kind of scares me when I realized that I am going further into studying and honoring the Canaanite pantheon.  For all my bouncing in and out of Catholicism, I have felt a response to my calls to the Gracious Deities: Athiratu, Anatu, Choranu, so far.  I am drawn to Them, the way I used to be drawn to the Virgin Mary.  My connection isn’t that clear with them yet, but the glimpses I get during prayer or simply meditating upon Them have shown me that They are very present.  Anatu is a goddess of action (and Her myth and associations scare the heck out of me); Choranu is quiet and steadfast; Athiratu has helped me with Her wisdom and sheer presence to help me find a stable center.

I’ll probably find out more, as soon as I get over myself and reach out. I am a master of worrying myself out of actually doing anything.

Resources that helped me get started on learning about Canaanite religion:

Tess Dawson – Her works are what introduced me to Anatu and the Canaanite pantheon:
Kina’ani: Impressions of Tess Dawson, Canaanite Polytheist (blog)
Natib Qadish (very informational website!)
Whisper of Stone
The Horned Altar

Lilinah’s website Qadash Kinahnu, a very informative site that brings a second perspective to the books above.



Looking for Pagans in Seattle

One thing about being an Eclectic/Christopagan is not having a Pagan (usually Wiccan) community to visit.  Seattle and the surrounding cities actually have various Pagan/Wiccan/Eclectic groups practicing and meeting all year long.  There’s been at least one obstacle that I see and say “Nope, can’t do it.”

1. Too Far Away!  I have a little car that can get me between work and back.  It’s 12 years old and on its last legs, but it works for me.  Many of the events are actually held out in nature…which unfortunately, is not so much in downtown Seattle.  It would be cool to go to a weekend ritual held by Our Lady of the Earth and Sky in Redmond but not so great if my car breaks down there, which is way out of my way. Because…

2. I’m Still in the Broom Closet.  I’m already in one too many closets as it is.  My family doesn’t like it when anyone rocks the boat–socially, politically or ye gods, spiritually.  Opposition is ferocious.  For a long time, they thought the only religions in the world were Judaism, Christianity, and Islam.  Because anything else is clearly satanism…right…

3.  Strangers or Family?  The groups I’ve researched around the Puget Sound area seem to be very close, and not really set up for seekers that are testing out the spiritual waters.  From attending the beginner’s classes in Wicca, they are very friendly. It just seems that I don’t have the time to visit and study with them…

…Of course, these are just as much excuses as they are reasons.  If I really wanted to get more involved, I would find a way.  (Other than the car issue, there is ALWAYS a way.) It’s just getting the nerve up to do so that holds me back.

Speaking of pagan community, there’s been more activity to connect and network WA state’s pagans together.  The local pagan store, Edge of the Circle Books, is hosting the beginner’s classes about Wicca again this month.  There’s also the Puget Sound Pagan Resource Guide that went live online a few weeks ago.

I want to make this year different.  If I’m gonna make it count, I need to make the choices that show it matters to me…